Friday, June 30, 2006

The Perils of Endurance Racing...

*WARNING: The following images should not be viewed by children, the elderly, or anyone in between who is weak of stomach or mind. These men are untrained amateurs. Kids, do not try this at home, or anywhere else for that matter. These men aren't attractive at the best of times, put them on a bike for 8, 12 or 24 hours, and the results are shocking. You've been warned.

Your left arm will shrink during the race, rendering arm warmers useless.

You will be delusional, thinking that you are buffed and attractive to members of the opposite, and same, sex. You're not.

You will look like you've stepped into a vicious Anthony Mundine right hook. You haven't, but you will wish you did.

You will eat questionable 'food' prepared by questionable 'chefs' at 2am, just so you can sit in front of their heater.

You will sit in a lawnchair for an hour with your Camelbak still on, unable to feel it. You will still have the presence of mind to feel yourself though.

You will sit in your car for an hour, perplexed as to where the steering wheel has gone.

You will lose your hair. "I think I saw some of it down there, can you pick it up Gaz?"

You will be so tired, you will fall asleep while changing outfits, leaving you with horribly clashing jerseys/shorts/socks. You won't care that your socks haven't been washed (or fashionable) since the 2000 Olympics.

You will be startled in the middle of the night. "Who is this woman, and why is she trying to steal my socks?"

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