I told you I was Joe Kid!

As reported in an earlier post, I was a demon on the Dragster and the Yamaha Moto Bike....I also said I was probably guilty of shocking 70's fashion crimes, and now here's the awful proof. Mum, how could you dress me like that? Actually, I think I'm lookin' pretty damn sharp there, check out those oh-so-tight shorts, matched beautifully with the white and brown floral motif shirt. Complemented by the floral motif sissy-bar pad. Look how much bling is adorning my ride though... chrome fenders and chainguard, triple-barrel air horn, 3-speed stick-shift, twin headlights (dunno why I needed those, would never have been riding at night!), chrome front rack, whitewall tyres and white brake and gear cable housing. At one stage I was flying the Jolly Roger flag on the back, too! Then it all got stripped down to nothing, re-sprayed, and thrashed till it died. Then there's the Moto Bike.... look at my ingenuity, with the struts at the back. I think they were probably from some aluminium windows, as Dad was in that game at the time. The fork 'boots' were some old plastic piping I found up at the old dump where we used to ride, mustn't have had enough to make two the right length, judging by the pic. The struts weren't on there for long, I probably realised that they weren't adding any travel, just increasing the chances of my premature death. Either that or I couldn't climb aboard the bloody thing without a ladder. Scotty had one of these as well, and bought another a few years back apparently, which is sitting rusting in his garage today. He proferred this information to me via email last week:

"Yammys came out 74-76. I had a type A, standard seat, forged lower front forks, yellow. Type B had banana seat, silver looking fork lowers and a crank with 3 spider arms. Type C had banana seat and one piece bmx style cranks. I have a rusty 1975ish Yamaha Motobike in shed, not my original bike picked it up a few years ago. Not totally original but what is 30 years on. I thought you'd appreciate that piece of crappy trivia...............Scott."

I do, Scott, I do.

The Sounds of Silence

Hello darkness my old friend....
While neither Simon nor Garfunkel could make it, the Backs and I hit up Glenrock last night for my first night ride for a few weeks, and of course it was a blast. While I was sitting at the back trying not to implode due to my not-so-peak fitness, I realised that the aural elements of mountain biking are somewhat enhanced after dark. I made a mental list of sorts, and here's what I experienced.

*The 'scheeeeee' of tyres rolling over semi-dried mud.
*The 'sccrunchhhhh' of same tyres struggling through loose gravel.
*The 'hhfff, hhfff, hhfff' of my laboured breathing as we climbed Shit Pipe Hill for the second time.
*The 'hhhoooiiiikkk, pttt' of throats being cleared.
*The 'pgggghhhh-tschhh' of the waves crashing onto the sand as we traversed the headland.
*The 'clikclikcrrrunch' of a botched shift, usually followed by 'f@*K!'
*The rustle of leaves as a small possum climbed away from us as we slogged through ankle deep slop.
*The silent but visible smiles on our dials at the end of another soul-cleansing two-wheeled adventure.
Priceless.

A Mountain Biker will win Le Tour

Yes, you heard it here first. After the first long Time Trial of the Tour, my prediction of Floyd Landis as a likely winner is looking ok. And our boy Cadel is sitting nicely too. If either of these guys wins it, then we can safely say that mountain bikers rule! (Even though Landis wasn't much chop on the dirt.) Don't count out Kloden either. I think it might come down to these three in the mountains, setting up a showdown in the final TT. Who'd have thought that drugs could have a 'positive' effect on a bike race?


Cheer up Floyd, Lance hasn't arrived at the Tour yet....

While I'm blowing smoke up my own arse, I also predicted that Gonchar/Honchar was a chance in this stage, in my article in Bicycling Australia Magazine. But the best outcome of the stage was Hincrappy losing time, and his sudden reluctance to talk himself up. Hopefully by the time Armstrong arrives (he thinks he's welcome there for some reason), he will be out the arse where he belongs.

Beer of the Week

Since there's 'beer' in the title of this humble little blurg, I thought it might be time to tell you what I'm drinking, rather than just drinking it! So here I give you the inaugural inductee into the Brewski Hall of Fame.
A top little drop this one, from my favourite brewer, the Malt Shovel Brewery, and Mr. James Squire. This is their Golden Ale, which sits somewhere in taste between their Pilsener (excellence personified), and the Amber Ale. Tastes a lot hoppier than an ale usually does, quite a light body and a nice golden colour. Probably why they named it such. Not too malty, as some ales taste to me. But I could be wrong, as I'm very, very, drunk.

Oscar winner!

I've got a lot of time for this guy.... three World Championships, and now only his second Tour stage win, well done Mr. Friere. Only one more chance for the sprinters, then the real race starts on Saturday with the first time trial. Let's hope Cadel can pull out a good ride, I think Rogers might do a good TT, but will probably get shelled in the mountains. My tip for Paris is still Landis, he's been hiding nicely, yeah I know he's a Yank, but Lance hates him, so he's alright by me! As long as Hincrappy does nothing, things are good.


I love seeing the briiliant architecture during the TV coverage, not so keen on listening to Sherwin trying to explain what the significance of the buildings is. "This is an old church, it was used in the 18th Century as a church, mainly for religious purposes, and later as a place of worship, before becoming a shrine to the leader of the Catholics, or Anglicans possibly.... you can see there that is has a roof."

WTF?

Check this out, for those who don't know me, this all took place right out the front of where I work! Shop was shut at the time though. I happened upon this story by chance...

Assault accused dies after being arrested

More Random-ness

*It's hard to be humble: when you're an American Pro cyclist, apparently. Looks like Hincapie has been taking lessons in humility from his former leader. After the first stage of Le Tour, when he gained the yellow jersey, Hincrappy could only say how disappointed he was in the Prologue to come second, and that he deserved to get the yellow. No mention that Hushovd rode a great Prologue, or how in the Stage 1 sprint that Thor had his arm almost cut off by a spectator's promotional inflatable hand. No, it's all about George. Good to see Thor get the yellow back on Stage 2. Here's hoping Hincapie hits an inflatable hand with his throat.

*World Crap Soccer: I'm a huge football (real football i.e soccer) fan, but this World Cup has been a bit of a let-down so far for me. Sure, there's been some great goals and a lot of controversial refereeing, but the teams are all playing so cautiously, trying not to lose rather than to win. Australia did great to reach the second round, and were a little unlucky to lose to Italy, but all the whinging from the uninformed Aussie public and sections of the media became a bit tedious. Bottom line is, Neill should've known better than to attempt a tackle in the box in the dying minutes of a WC game. He says he'll be haunted by it forever, and that's justice enough!

*Tomkinson sent me a link to a video of him and his hop buddies doing their thing at Terrigal, I can't open it but I'll post the link and hopefully you guys might be able to view it. Here's hopping, I mean hoping.

*Are Liggett et al watching the same race as I am? In the sprint in Stage 2, McEwen and Hushovd almost tangle, with Thor unclipping and one-legging it across the line. He then points at Robbie as if to say "he chopped me". I noticed this straight away. Somehow Liggett, Sherwin, Basheer and that putz Tomalaris all were repeatedly saying Thor was pumping his fist in joy that he'd gotten the yellow jersey back. And I'm certain I later heard Tomalaris call the Saunier Duvall team "Soviet Duvall". SBS, wake up, it's time for BrettOK to step into the fold!

I AM Joe Kid!!

Never forget your roots.... OK, I'm a child of the 70's, and back then bicycles were as huge a part of my life as they are today. We'd always be out riding, building tracks and jumps, and tinkering with our Dragsters, stripping them down to emulate our motocross heroes, with varying results. Then I was the envy of my mates when I was lucky enough to be bought one of these. A Yamaha Moto Bike.
Pimpin, bitchin, stylin! But still I'd tinker with it. I remember trying to extract more travel from the twin shocks at the rear by crudely adding aluminium struts between the top shock mounts and the frame. How I never died riding it in that configuration I'll never know. There's photos around somewhere, I'll try and dig em up in the next few days. I recall a photo of me with my Dragster pulling this exact same pose, probably wearing clothes just as bad as these! Anyway, all these memories came flooding back on the weekend when Johnny K and myself watched Joe Kid on a Stingray, a doco on the history of BMX. (click on the 'trailer' for a sneek peek) What a great film. It was like looking into my own childhood. The bikes, the riders, the bad hair, it was my life right there on the big screen. Even if you weren't around in the 70's, or have never ridden a BMX bike, this film is really worth checking out. No hi-tech equipment, no extreme attitudes, just kids riding their bikes and having a blast. Exactly how it should be.

Random Shite

Ok, there's a few things I'd like to say, but they don't really warrant their own posts, so I'll just scrunch em all up in a little ball and throw it at you. Here we go.

*MAGNETS WIN AGAIN! Scotty and Deano cleaned up again yesterday at Rd. 4 of the Working Week Series at Yarramundi, West Sydney. Deano said that Scotty was doing some good times, which would make a nice change! Sorry Scotty. Deano also said that they both woke up angry and fired up after they both had dreams about Burgo! That's enough to make anyone angry....

*SBS's Tour Coverage: Kudos to SBS for bringing us live stages every night again this year. Brickbats to SBS for allowing Mike Tomalaris to get anywhere near a bike race. He is a hack! Every year I write to SBS to point out this fact, and the fact that I could be doing his job so much better... I'll be writing again this year I think, if he keeps up his inauspicious start to the Tour... I'm sure he wouldn't get Armstrongs name wrong, so what excuse is there for stating Valverde's first name as 'Allesandro'? (It's Alejandro). He must be sacked, or killed.

*Weekend adventures: Myself, Tomky, Christine and Kedan met up with Nath at Ourimbah on Sunday for a ride, we were all suffering a little, not just from lack of fitness, but from some bad choices in routes, thanks Nath! But what's a ride without a little adventure? Read Christine's account here.

*You know it's cold when.... Bolts (my cat) stays in all night, for 5 nights running!

*Testing, testing, 1 2 3... Got sent some product to test for the mag last week, a saddle from Syncros and a cable sealing kit from Clarks. Mmmmm, free stuff!

Death to Dickheads

Went down to the Central Coast last weekend for Nath's birthday. Waiting outside a club for a cab, I spotted a young fella coming out wearing a "Death To The Pixies" T-shirt. I thought, "Cool, the younger generation aren't all completely devoid of musical taste." Then he started abusing the doormen and other punters, offering anyone within earshot the chance to "suck my f'in c*ck" over and over. I declined to take him up on the offer, but I did feel like ripping the shirt from his back and giving it a decent home. The Pixies don't deserve that!